Token Word of the Day: Coon

I wanted to do a post entitled "Can you not be a coon for one day of your life?" But I realized that I should probably make a definition for coon, considering many of my readers (All 4 of you) might not know what that word means.

*Coon: (n) A black person who is basically a stereotypic caricature of themselves. They exhibit their coonery in profoundly numerous ways. You typical everyday coon will be one of those black people that make other black people cringe and face palm. You know the everyday person you might see on the news after a murder or other tragic events happens in the "hood"? There is a decent chance that the reporter found the worst person imaginable person is a coon. However!!!!!! Don't think that coons are relegated to poverty! They can be found in the uppereschelons of society and be quite famous.**

You want some examples of a coon so incase you run into one you can recognize what exactly you are dealing with?

When I first saw this ignorant, ignorant coon on the internet I was like cotdamnit! Who let this fool ass reggin within 100ft of a camera. It's ok to have someone like this in your family or neighborhood but under no circumstances this cartoon of a person be famous... Ever.

WHAT IN THE AQUA BLUE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH A VIKING HORN ON? Who let this crack addict coon have his own TV show??? You know he once made a song called "She Watch Channel Zero" which extolled the pitfalls of too much TV? All said, you know at the end of the day <---- That guy is a musical genious who plays ALL of the instruments. But... Don't do drugs kids.

If you've never seen this woman good for you. A small significant piece of your soul is still pure and virtuous. For the rest of us.... COTDAMNIT THIS IS WORSE THAN ANDRE DODSON AND I THOUGHT THAT WAS THE LIMIT!!!!!!! Just stop using words you don't understand coons. It's just, ugh.

The worst type of coon is the type of coon who should certainly know better but exploits his coonery for this own advantage. I could hear an argument that the previous people didn't know any better and were products of their environment. I can't possibly see what would make Tyler Perry want to dress up as mammy and parade around as a woman. Also, make tv shows and HORRIBLE movies that set people back at least 30 years. It's a sad, sad, sad, horrible day that this man is more rich and famous that Spike Lee.









**Note: The token does the count the older black actors and actresses who are generally labeled coons... They had to do what they had to do to get paid. By mandate I am not allowed to knock the hustle.
* White people, don't call a black person a coon... It won't go well. Unless it's Tyler Perry, you can call him whatever you want.

Token is Traveling!!!!!!

   So check, check, chcheck it out wh wh wh what's it all about! For the 3 of you that probably read this blog you already know but (Hopefully) I'll have some new readers one day. The token is traveling!!! I bet you didn't see this coming with the name of the blog and what not. But yea, I'm going to a far away land to have a kick ass time and get paid for it protect America and her interests. I'll be somewhere in East Africa doing all sorts of awesome things and laying the righteous hand of god down leaving my own personal indelible imprint on East Africans. I suspect this journey will be fraught with lots of adversity and opening up my eyes to new cultures and ways of thinking. I really wonder what Africa is all about and what the people are like. Yes, I know Africa is by no means a monolith and it's huge so there will be numerous different perspectives that I have to account for.
    I remember being a kid and reading my favorite book of all time, The Autobiography of Malcolm X. I remember how when Malcolm got to Africa he was so surprised at the worldlyness of African's and their awareness of the (Im paraphrasing here) "plight of the negro in America". Not specifically pertaining to black people in America but what do they think about America and her people in general? I'm willing to bet they echo some of the same sentiments that I see on the interwebs. Will they think that know that things have changed? Will the recognize the ways that the changes have occurred? I wonder how they regard Obama and what he means for their lives verses how some black people in America feel. I'm VERY interested in how Africans regard me as a black American and what I'm all about. Will I experience a new found brotherhood that I've never experienced before? Will I be regarded as an "other" too dark for mainstream white acceptance but too light for mainstream African acceptance? Will attitudes change once they find out what it is I do there? These are all questions that I truly look forward to having answered and if not answered then experiencing.
    So many questions that I sincerely look forward to having answered! So many new experiences to drink in! I can't wait for this opportunity. Hopefully, nothing but positivity will come out of this.

All that said..... MURICA!!!!

Shunned the Eff out of Society

   I don't know about you but I have a deep seated hatred for lots and lots of people who do dumb stuff. Since murder is generally frowned upon illegal we obviously can't kill people to put an end to their foolery. My solution? Shun people! Shun people all the way out of society. If we do not shun these out of society they stand a dangerous chance of breeding and ushering in a new generation of people who are somewhere between completely mindnumbingly retarded and just plain stupid.

1. PEOPLE WHO DON'T USE TURN SIGNALS. If you don't use your turn signals when you turn you should get the eff out of society. Why in the name of everything that is sweet, merciful and holy would you drive a vehicle equipped with turn signals and not use them. Especially knowing that other people can't instinctively tell what you're going to do with your multiple thousand pound death wagon. The worse people in this terrible group of people are those who don't use turn signals and EGREGIOUSLY cut people off... IF YOU'RE GOING TO CAUSE MY IMMINENT DEMISE YOU SHOULD AT LEAST WARN ME SO I HAVE TIME TO MAKE PEACE WITH MY GOD. Even worse than these people are number 2.

2. PEOPLE WHO USE TURN SIGNALS IMPROPERLY. OK so here is the situation. You are driving along your merry way trying to gain access to some major thoroughfare and someone who is coming your way has their turn signal on. Of course you think that person is a standup, air breathing,  rationally thinking person deserving all rights and privileges afforded to such persons. You go to turn (because obviously this person is turning) and BAM!!!!!!! THEY JUST KEEP GOING STRAIGHT!! Now you have to pull some kind of crazy Jason Stratham type of driving to avoid certain death and talkery with Jesus. Why, in the name of everything that is right and holy would you keep a turn signal on whilst on a straightaway? Everyone else assumes that you're going to turn when you indicate so.

3. PRETTY MUCH ANYBODY WHO USES TURN SIGNALS WRONG. I think I've proven my point.

4. URINAL TALKERS. Now I realize that some of you are women and this doesn't apply to you... If it does apply to you and you're a woman that's gross and stop reading my blog immediately  society tells me that's socially acceptable... I guess. Anyway, THAT IS AWKWARD! Why oh why would you want to have a conversation with another man while your penis is in your hand. Is it just me? Am I alone in this??? CAUSE I SEEM TO BE!!! It seems that all the time people are talking to me whilst my winky is in my hand. Non sexy time (with at least 2 other women) I don't want to have any kind of conversation with a man wile I'm touching myself (not really in that way). We could be butt naked in the locker room and have a conversation and it is less awkward than you flapping your worthless gums to me while I'm taking care of business.

5. WOMEN WHO FAKE ORGASMS. Now I don't know if you're doing this or not. I don't even know if the Monkey does this but I'm going to go in anyway, ride with me. You "ladies" do realize that you're messing the WHOLE game up for everyone right? First of all, you aren't getting any satisfaction out of the current Thronxing that you're receiving so why encourage it? Makes less than absolute zero sense and that's not even scientifically possible. Second, you are releasing all of this bad winky into the general female population! If you don't care about your own "moment" have some thought for your fellow ladies and stop letting these non thronxing dudes think they are winning!!! Third, as a man, I want to know if I'm not putting it down properly so I change... Well, I have nothing to change because no girl has ever admitted to faking. -_-

Well, that's it. I just got my tail whipped in chess so I'm no longer filled with the raging fury of 10,000 dying suns.